The simple solution

The variety of things that hinder my sleep is almost incomprehensible: car alarms and horns, tires skidding on ice, snow shovelling, leaf blowers, tree cutters, teenagers yelling, loud spanish music at all hours of the day and night. The array is obscure, yet not one morning passes by without me being woken up from one of these awful sounds. Most recently, my homocidal rage has escalated quite briskly into a blinding fury. I have woken up for almost a week to cars that are stuck in their spots. they are stuck, I SWEAR (if this weren't true, I wouldn't have experienced hours of high pitched squeals while people tried to move them).

I'm assuming that my anger got the best of me after many mornings without proper rest-- because, a couple of days ago, when I awoke to constant shoveling, I immediately saw red. I opened my window, and my eyes darted like a lion who has caught the scent of its prey. I found the culprit, chipping away at ice in the ally across the street. Why? I didn't see a car. no front door. So I yelled really loud and really viciously (what else is new?). I have no idea what I said for sure, but it was intended to frighten him and mostly, to give him an ultimatum of his shovel or my fist.

I can't stress enough just how often my sleep is interrupted by stupid, inconsiderate people. The most common yet strange occurence living across from a mexican hostel (this detail still remains a mystery) is that around 2 or 3 am on any given night of the week, a car with EXTREMELY loud spanish music pulls up, honks, and continues to idle for 15 minutes (still blasting spanish music). When I wake up in my apartment, I forget at first that I'm in America, seriously. What a lack of respect this neighborhood has.

Anyway, I was totally set on walking, in my pajamas and mismatched sneakers, up to the guy shovelling. I imagined punching him in the face and THEN asking what he could possibly be thinking at 10 am on my only day off. I got out the door but arms reached around my waist to pull me back, kicking and yelling. I know he heard it because he stopped 10 minutes later (after a couple hours of shovelling). What I would have done to knock him out. Much simpler solution.